WHOO!! Theres nothing that turns a bad week good like unexpected interactions with Creationists!! Checked my school e-mail this morning to find out the Baptist students were bringing in a speaker to present the topic "Comparative Immunology and the Quest to Understand our Origins." Unfortunately I read this email in class, and appeared to randomly burst out in giddy laughter, but luckily I already warned this prof I was going to be a bit off today, and I think he just thinks I REALLY like EGF receptors...
I was so excited because any time you see the words 'Baptist' and 'origins' together, you know youre in for a real Creationist treat. Though they have no Pope, the official Baptist stance is that 'Evilution is a Lie.' So I Googled the dude, Donald Ewert, and look where I found him:
So after class, a classmate and I told our mentors we were going to 'an immunology seminar' and trotted off to see how everything we had been learning in class was a lie. OMG you guys, I dont think Ive ever laughed this hard for an entire hour. Few opening observations:
- They provided lunch. Normally there are lots of vegetarians in the research world, so usually these things have pizza/wraps/something where they could get a veggie alternative. NOT THE BAPTISTS! The knew I was an outsider from the get-go cause I wouldnt eat their ham and roast beef sandwiches from Arbys. So for lunch I had Wal-Mart cookies. I had to take almost an entire sleeve because they were all melted together. Note to self: Never expect decent food from Baptists again.
- As I was waiting in line for my Wal-Mart cookies, I noticed the girl in front of me had a keychain on her backpack "BIG BANG THEORY: GOD SAID BANG! AND IT WAS BIG!" I know my dear readers have as dirty of a mind as I do, so go ahead and go there.
- It was like "Romper Room" in reverse. "I dont see Curtis! I dont see Kristen! I dont see Sushma!" There was no one there from our department except me and my friend. I dont think there was even anyone from the Graduate College-- though the school is huge, everyone was in scrubs/white jackets, so they were med/dental/nursing students. Ugh.
- Dude almost had to use my Macbook (with all my Behe shit on the desktop) because his animations werent Windows compatible. Alas, I didnt have a DIV-VGA cord, so no help from me, and no animations for the presentation.
- He became interested in this topic because of the Dover Trial. He is an expert because he has 'read books for several months.'
- The Dover Trial was in 2003.
- Those devious prosecutors did a literature dump on poor Behe! Behe didnt have time to read those papers! Why would Behe be familiar with any of those publications?
- Since there are no 'intermediates' alive, we cant test evolution.
- Phylogenetic trees are a fraud. You can make them do anything.
- Quote mines.
- Evilutionists think V-D-J came about when a bacteria infected the germ line of a shark. Note: this wasnt a momentary mis-speak-- this guy didnt know the difference between bacteria and retroviruses.
- Throws Judge Jones under the bus.
- Galileo Gambit
AndrewAntony Flew Gambit. Seriously, that was his closer. Came out of left field.